So Chingay 2012 is overrrrrrrrrr in a blink of an eye.
Should be doing homework now, but lemme do this reflection first since last night was too shagged.
Honestly, one of the biggest reasons why I joined Chingay was to get over him. Try to forget the love I loved most.
I couldn't understand why he could get over me so easily when I dreamt of him every night and pictured him first thing in mornings.
Then my Chingay friend, Michelle told me. If someone let you go so easily, he definitely isn't worth it.
But during trainings from the very start when I felt lonely I started to stare the moon and think of him again.
The theme for Chingay is "Love, Care and Kindness everywhere" and the SOKA item....
SOKA item before finale
It was really very meaningful. There was free expression section of the dance where each and every one of us portrayed our own struggles
that we are facing. I really dance my heart out since I was used to my contemp style. I could feel the pains and struggles of those around me.
Then, the music changed. We triumphed over our challenges! It was the tribal dance. Really smiled until my cheeks got numb HAHAHA!
Somehow I could really relate to the dance.
Another meaningful experience for me was...
Fire torch item at the beggining of the show!
We did it together with hwachong MAD dancers some of whom I met during dance camp.
Secretly I was hoping I could do the pas de deux also the girls looked so pretty just above the water.
The fire torch really meant a lot to me.
During rehearsals, my torch didn't light up countless of times. I thought I would be doomed, during the real show what would happen?
I began to doubt my faith. I remembered once, my friend Michelle again tried fervently to light up my unlit torch.
Then, I really felt true friendship. Also another close friend that I made was Weixian. We would meet up and go for trainings together (:
I'm really thankful I made a good friend like her. It was the full dress. The two standing in front and behind of me couldn't light their torches as they didn't bring safety goggles. However, mine couldn't lit up but they asked us to continue to prevent those behind from lagging.
My heart broke because I chanted for the fire to light. What made things worst was that I was feeling sick/ feverish. ALSO. those in the audience kind of laughed and I heard comments "Why didn't your fire light up?" I was tearing behind my goggles. But this taught me no matter the humiliation by others, some times you are just alone you have to stay strong. I will.
The actual show yesterday. I was glad that my prayers got answered. My torch lit up easily. It was burning with passion.
I also managed to keep my smile throughout hope we wowed the audience. However when the motorcyclists passed us, a heavy wind swept through us, our flame grew weaker almost going to be extinguished. But not only did mine not extinguish, I created that flowy effect which made my flame look stronger. When I was walking to the end of the platform, my fire was so small but it reminded me during my life problems, there's still a little hope in the darkest of dusk. Dawn will always come.
When my fire finally got extinguished by the personnel. I cheered so hard! Other people thought it wasjust a simple task but to me it's more than that. I felt a sense of accomplishment and also, all good things must come to an end.
Just like how life is, all of us will one day reach the end of the road.
It is how you live your life. How before you sleep, you can say "I have no regrets".
Chingay 2012 will always have a place in my heart.
Maybe Chingay kept me so occupied I forgot a lot of my personal problems. I remembered when we were still together he told me after Chingay next year I will go and find you. I had my hopes high. Anyways, I was overjoyed once. Yes, still, no regrets that I love you.
Wake up call for me to live life to the fullest.
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